When two people start a relationship, they expect a lot from each other. They want their partner to be there through the good and bad times alike. Naturally, no one wants to feel that their lover dislikes him or her.
If you are asking yourself questions like why does my boyfriend hate me? you could be at an important crossroads, and it is in your best interest to get to the crux of the problem here, even if this may mean revealing unpleasant truths that you previously tried to shove under the rug. Remember: it’s possible to make hard decisions that safeguard and improve your life once you found your inner voice. Finding your voice does not imply engaging in verbal conflicts, but it is about understanding hidden problems.
Usually, it’s a toxic relationship that makes you wonder why your boyfriend hates you. In a pickle like this, you must cope with multiple challenges that erode your inner strength, and the relationship’s negativity might cause your self-esteem to drop like a rock to the seabed. Why does it happen?
What Makes a Man Adore a Woman? 9 Key Traits
Where did the conflict arise?
Having a man accuse you of being the worst female he has ever seen may be too much. Unless it’s a part of a game you play that ends in acting out a sexual fantasy, when your boyfriend informs you that he doesn’t want you in his life anymore, it’s a negative sign. When subjected to an aggressive outburst, the “relational ego” withdraws, and its capacity to process information correctly drops, leaving you alone with unpleasant emotions that make you want to crawl in a ball and cry.
However, hard as it may be, you need to understand what’s up. Your boyfriend is not necessarily thinking of moving on or has lost the spark that made him adore you in the past despite your erratic and entitled behavior. No, there could be other reasons that may create differences and issues between you two… although, let’s face it: if your boyfriend hates you and you like him, chances are, the problem’s in you.
Let’s try to understand what the reasons could be.
Are you too busy?
Remember! Your boyfriend seeks importance, attention, and love from you. As such, he wants to (1) be your top priority and (2) spend time with you. He may tell you it’s OK to disappear from his life for a while, but if your schedule is packed all the time that’s unacceptable. If you’re too busy for a relationship, don’t have one: it’s as simple as that.
To help the situation, spend time with him, and concentrate on him (not your phone). Women are usually good at managing their time, and here you have to utilize your time management skills for something considerably more worthwhile than a marketing plan for your looney client.
Are you overly dominant?
Does your boyfriend feel smothered in your relationship, or he can also think you’ve forgotten about him if you don’t spend enough time with him? If so, his feelings for you will deteriorate and he’ll start hating you for what he perceives as your not being a good girlfriend for him. By the way, this doesn’t include sex: some men are totally crazy about women who are dominant in bed.
Do you criticize your boyfriend too much?
Nobody likes a nagging bitch: the bitches that men love are a different kind, and if you are wondering why your boyfriend hates you, you can bet you are not one of them.
Most women have been guilty of making fun of their boyfriend’s culinary abilities or comparing his physic, abilities, and success to other men. Could you be part of the overwhelming majority of women who drive men nuts with this nasty habit? You could think it’s funny, but don’t wait to find out that you’re single via a text message to realize that these cliche “jokes” of you that make you look like a bad comedian from a worse show can hurt others.
Is your ex still part of your daily conversations?
Everyone has their past, and of course, you also have recollections of your former relationships (especially if they were good in bed). However, if you continuously think about an ex and compare him to your new boyfriend, sooner or later he is going to start hating you very much.
Bringing up your ex may make your current partner feel inadequate. If you don’t understand your partner’s discontent, try not to bring up your ex for a while, and see what happens. If nothing does, bring up your ex out of the blue and watch your boyfriend flip out: that may teach you the invaluable lesson of thinking twice before doing something like this.
Do you respect your boyfriend’s personal space?
The answer to this question is also going to be “no” most of the time, and that’s the wrong answer.
We all need personal space, and it’s fair to keep a few secrets no one knows about. Your boyfriend is just like that, too. Even if he loves you madly (which is probably not the case if you are wondering why he hates you), sometimes he needs you to leave him alone to pursue his other interests (such as spending time with his friends and family or chilling on his own).
Remember: if your boyfriend is worth his salt, his life does not rotate around you and includes things that he’ll choose over you in a heartbeat until you prove that you are the one for him. So don’t try to change who he is. Rather, use the free time you get from leaving him alone to improve yourself.
Do you never appreciate him in bed?
Did you know that sex requires a lot more energy from men than women? Not to mention the focus it takes to get an erection. So, if you don’t appreciate the effort your boyfriend takes in bed when he does, he’ll have one of the best reasons to hate you beyond repair.
Males believe they need to satisfy their partner in bed. As a result, they begin to second guess themselves and wonder whether you are happy with them, which causes them to doubt things others take for granted. Make your boyfriend feel like “The sex God” and be the queen of his heart; otherwise, you can break up with him on the spot because your relationship is doomed anyway.
Did you check your synastry compatibility?
When discussing the complexities of relationships, an intriguing perspective that is gaining popularity is synastry: the branch of astrology that examines the compatibility between two people based on their natal (birth) charts. It provides insights into the dynamics, attractions, and challenges that may be present in the relationship.
While popular astrology tends to focus on Sun Signs compatibility (e.g., Scorpios are compatible with Cancers), synastry examines the interplay between the planets, houses, and aspects in two individual’s charts. This can help highlight areas of harmony and potential conflict.
One of the significant advantages of synastry is that it can shed light on the underlying reasons for certain behaviors. For instance, if a partner seems overly possessive, this could be attributed to their Venus in Scorpio. Or if a boyfriend is emotionally distant, it could be due to their Moon in Aquarius. By understanding these placements, one can approach relationship challenges with more compassion and empathy.
Examples: Moon, Mercury, Venus
Sometimes the reasons behind “Why does my boyfriend hate me?” might not be personal at all. With the help of synastry, one can discern if certain misunderstandings arise from inherent astrological differences.
Emotional expression and security (the Moon)
If your Moon (emotions and security) falls in your partner’s 12th House (secrets and the unconscious), you may sometimes feel that your emotional expressions are hidden or not acknowledged. Your partner may unintentionally make you feel like you have to keep your feelings a secret, leading to feelings of isolation.
Communication styles (Mercury)
Mercury in your partner’s 3rd House can indicate lively conversations and a mutual understanding in daily communication. However, if it’s in a challenging aspect to your partner’s planets, it might also suggest misunderstandings or disagreements about details.
Approach to love (Venus)
Venus in your partner’s 10th House can suggest that your partner sees you as someone who boosts their public image or career ambitions. This can be flattering but can also lead to feelings of being used or valued only for one’s social standing.
Why does my boyfriend hate me? Conclusion
It takes a lot of effort to build and maintain a healthy and successful romantic relationship. Girls (especially young and inexperienced ones who don’t know what they want) are often guilty of doing things that annoy the living daylights out of their boyfriends. Since there are so many serious reasons that can make your boyfriend hate you if you’re asking yourself why he does you should take an honest look at yourself and decide what’s wrong with you in his eyes.
Most likely, things you’ll discover will not be easy to fix, but you may want to try anyway: what’s at stake here is a lot more than a happy relationship with a guy who you may want to dump once you become more desirable. See, if your average boyfriend hates you already, what are your chances of impressing a prince? It figures. So, don’t believe in fairy tales designed to take advantage of your gullibility and work on your personality instead: this way, you’ll drastically increase your marriage market value and actually may end up with a guy who is not a total loser.